A Little Unsolicited Advice
When I think about it, I realize that the relationships I enjoy the most or the times in my life I remember most fondly are the ones in which I could really be myself. The people with whom I am free to be all aspects of me, no matter how wacky or sad or stupid or sarcastic. I think that's part of what I long for when I feel like something is missing from my life, those places and people with whom I can let it all hang out.
But let me tell you, those friendships and situations become rarer the older you get in life. Think about it, how frequently can you fully be yourself--your real self--and feel accepted and appreciated and even valued for it?
So here's a little unsolicited advice. Take note of the people and places with whom you feel the best about yourself and treasure them. Nurture them and never take them for granted, because they will become more valuable to you as time goes by and you will really miss them when they're gone.
Sia--"Where I Belong" mp3 off Colour the Small One (buy)
Marianne Faithfull--"My Friends Have" mp3 off Before the Prison (buy)
James Taylor--"Places in My Past" mp3 off Mud Slide Slim and the Blue Horizon (buy)
Very wise and beautifully written as always. I find more and more that I
can be only a little piece of myself here or there. I like your idea of
taking stock of the situations where we feel most at home- it should be an
interesting and pretty revealing thing to do.
not to give you any more unsolicited advice, but as a young mother you
really need to be careful not to put yourself second behind everyone else's
needs all the time. try to carve out and preserve those places and things
that you do that are just yours. i learned this the hard way. :)
I'm not sure that I agreee with you that these kind of relationships get
rarer as you get older. But I definitely agree that they're worth hanging
on to. And I love "Mud Slide Slim"
Why is it that YOU can so eloquently sum up what's going on in MY head, yet
I have trouble finding the words when I try writing?
afm--you don't think those kinds of relationships become fewer and farther
between as you get older? maybe it has to do more with my being a mom and a
wife and other things that seem to compartmentalize who i am, which leads
to my not always being able to be myself (kind of like what greer is
saying), which makes it all the more special or gratifying when i find
myself in a situation or relationship where i can be myself without all the
labels or roles i usually play. but i imagine that happens to most
everyone. i dunno. :)
Oh, sistah, I know exactly what you mean. You see, I have what I like to
think of as a sardonic, sarcastic sense of humour, although it is widely
debated how humorous it actually is. Some people don't get it and get
offended, so I've largely stopped making jokes most of the time.
Consequently, at office parties, people often say to me "I didn't realize
you were so funny. You're usually so quiet."
lyle--i had a remarkably similar experience the other day with my husband.
i said something that i wouldn't say in front of too many other
people--maybe none--and he definitely got it. it's a good feeling. of
course, you'd hope someone you've been with for so long would still get
you, but i know that's not always the case. :)
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