Crazy Is as Crazy Does

    OK folks, here's a little truth about me that you may or may not already know: I'm a crazy person.

    Here are two great examples of how I am equal parts maniacally competitive and lazy at the same time. You remember how I frantically cleaned the house in preparation for grandma's visit, right? I even washed down cupboards and dusted light fixtures--in the rooms I was certain she'd use, that is. I did not clean my own bathroom, however, as I a) didn't have time and b) figured she'd never go in there anyway, so why bother?

    Well, I was wrong. Saturday morning I came home from the gym and there she was, using my bathroom sink. I was mortified, but what could I do? Apologize for the mess and tell her it was still dirty because I only cleaned those rooms I thought she'd see?

    OK, the second example is more about the competitve part. There is a couple in our neighborhood who, for whatever reason, refuse to acknowledge my existence whenever they see me in public. I really don't know why they don't say hello, but they don't. I don't particularly care for them, so it's no big loss on my part, but it bothers me. I mean, who the fuck do they think they are?

    Anyway, here's the thing. Yesterday at the gym the only available elliptical machine happened to be smack dab in the middle of the two they were on. I really wanted to use that kind of machine, so I went right up and plopped myself on it.

    But that's not all. I decided I would show them what kind of shape I was in--put them to shame is more like it--so I ellipticized like a maniac. I turned the resistance way up and I went as fast as I could for as long as they were both on either side of me. I went much faster and at higher levels than either of them and I went longer. Boy, I sure showed them, didn't I?

    So you see, I am really a crazy person.

Blitzen Trapper--"Crazy on You (Heart Cover)" mp3 off Bridging the Distance--Portland, OR (buy--this is a great compilation album of covers that was done to raise funds for the Portland, OR organization pearmentor.org, which works with at-risk youth in the Portland area.) 

tags: blitzen trapper  

links: digg this    del.icio.us    technorati